How Deep Does Your Ocean Go?

So guys, this post is very personal to me. Very raw. I have a lot of emotions about this and it’s something that several men and women deal with every day. I think this post is something I feel I need to write because it weighs on my heart and ties into my fitness journey a bit.

This post can also tie to men as well but I will speak to the ladies out there because that is the only perspective I know.

Ladies, have you ever felt remotely disappointed in someone coming to you and telling you how hot you are or how perfect you are because it seems that that person only sees your skin? I mean let’s be honest, everyone see’s the skin first and decides if that person is attractive to them. That’s a natural human reaction. However, when someone walks up to you and says “Wow, your body is amazing, you’re so hot.” another natural reaction, is a fleeting moment of pride. But for me it turns into sadness. This is because I want to be seen for my heart. I have a big heart that has been let down more times than I can count. I am careful about who I give my heart to in friendships, significant others, and anyone who walks into my life.

I want to be seen for my heart because looks go away. Beauty and fitness levels go down. However, the heart and soul of a person is a beautiful mess that sticks to someone with deeper levels than the skin. The ocean is a good metaphor in this situation. The ocean is deep, with many levels. Creatures live in the different depths of the ocean. This is similar to the human heart and soul. Creatures live in each level of that heart and soul. Although, to see those parts of a person is like pealing back an onion, you have to get through the pain of that stinging in your eyes to be able to cook it into the meal you are making.

The disappointment I feel when men come to me to say such things might be dramatic for some people to hear me speak in this way. But I can tell you it has brought me down in several situations. Part of this is because I have a deep respect for myself and for others. I have worked for every gain in my muscles and I do not ever take that lightly. I can be hard on myself and criticize everything about my body. Which I have found to be very destructive to myself. It can be difficult to hear a man say how hot you are and how much they want to see you body when you know that is not your top asset. You wish the thing they were seeing was the ocean inside of you. And being asked to see your body is a level of disrespect and disregard to how that woman might react to that request.

The amount of pressure in our generation and society tears us as humans apart in several ways. In a relationship, women throw everything at a man who simply doesn’t appreciate the woman in the way they had been created to be appreciated. Now men this goes for you all as well. Men can be seen for their bodies and not their heart as they wish it could be. It’s an all around the world problem. We are all visual creatures. However, the normality of asking to see something so private when you have very little information of people asking, is unfathomable. I think its hard now a days because trust is hard to come by.

In many ways this connects to my fitness journey/love. One reason being that Mei Fitness has dwindled several anxious thoughts while I’m there. The focus I speak about while in the southport location of Mei is very important to me. Those day
s when I’m thrown off guard by a comment of some sorts I am able to go in and zone out the world around me and lift the weights while music blasting. I can cut out the negative thoughts that had clouded my mind and blow into my workout without being distracted. The negative thoughts drip away in the sweat that comes off my brow with each weight I lift. It’s a relief of all things, never a chore.

Ladies you were never made to “fall in line”. You are precious and worth more than life. I tell you my struggles because it’s something I’ve had to deal with and know there are several more out there that might feel the same. I am deeper than skin and I have an ocean inside of me that I know will be seen by someone special.

 

 

YOGA = FRESH START

Flexibility. One of my worst and weakest parts of being in the gym…. However, I’ve been working on changing that. There are several positives for flexibility and stretching in general. Although for me, yoga did the trick.

I love yoga. Its relaxing and surprisingly challenging. I went through a really rough time a while back with a
bunch of personal life problems and started doing yoga. I had worn myself down from being in the gym so much, my immune system was so low to the point where I was sick for about a month with some good days. So this is when I got into yoga. I went to a small juice/yoga shop in Greenwood Indiana where I met an amazing lady who became a confidant and friend. She had told me yoga might be something I should look into, with everything going on and my immune system being so low. At first I hated the idea because I could get my stress out at the gym and I didn’t wanna lose anything that I had gained. Well, my better judgement told me I needed to slow down or else I’d be doing more damage to myself than good if I had kept up the rate I had been going.

I stopped going to the gym for a while and started doing some yoga. The first time I walked out of that studio, I had felt like a huge weight lifted from my shoulders and for once in a while I had been relaxed. I Kept going for a while and learned some new moves. I gained more flexibility and felt better than ever. Once I got back into the gym my body had had enough time to heal and rejuvenate. My body was able to withstand more physical stress and lift heavier weights. My core had gotten much stronger as well! Let me tell y’all, yoga really did the trick.

Now that I’m back in my home gym at Mei Fitness on southport I don’t have as much time for yoga in the studio with an instructor. Thankfully though, this fitness center has a beautiful studio room where I can still practice my moves and find peace in yoga.

I can go long periods with no stretching which I figure, isn’t the best of habits. I’ve committed myself to practice in Mei’s yoga studio each week, at least 3 times along with my workouts. I want to gain more flexibility in my fitness journey. For one I will gain more strength along with less possibility for an injury. My mental and physical performance will improve by miles.

I challenge anyone who has not tried yoga to do so! you won’t regret it at all. I know if I hadn’t tried yoga in the time that I needed it I would be in a different place. I probably wouldn’t have found my motivation or drive to get after my dreams. I am sure I wouldn’t have been able to get back on the horse and ride harder than before. I’d beaten the hell out of that horse and was exhausted. Yoga saved me. To be honest I could be more proud of where I have come. I’ve driven hard and become stronger. Not only physically but mentally as well. I know what I want and I know I’ll get there.

 

I AM STRONG, I AM IMPORTANT, AND I AM BEAUTIFUL IN ME

The most difficult body part for me to build up are my glutes. Is there anyone else out there with that problem? You see, I get so frustrated sometimes because I look at all the beautiful gals on instagram and twitter and think, “Why can I not build these buns faster than its going?”. I let my insecurities of other people all over the internet, get in my way of what I know to be true of myself and what my goals are. Any other ladies out there feel that way?! I mean come on… we all have a type of envy for another woman’s body. It’s natural in this society today. Some days can be worse than others, but it doesn’t change the fact that your goals are only yours and you have complete control over how you accomplish those goals.

When I started going to Mei Fitness at the Southport location, my workouts got better. Reasons being I could focus completely on my goals in the gym and what I wanted out of myself and my body. I know I talk a lot about Mei but like I said, Mei has made my goals much easier to reach.

Lets me just talk about the 8 different squat racks they have for a second. These racks have mirrors that stretch alll the way down the wall. For me this is a number one plus because I get to watch my form and make sure what I’m doing is correct. And the 4 plat forms?! May I just say I have been to Planet Fitness, Get Fit Gym, and LA Fitness and not one has such beautiful platforms. Or platforms at that. Not EVEN 8 racks!! Like geez oh Pete, we all know how busy the gym gets at rush hour! Oh! And not to mention the 6 different types of leg presses…. each other gym I have been to had maybe two to three different types. Let me finish this rant by saying: ladies, if you’re looking to build up those glutes Mei is the place to do it. Men, we know you like gaining the booty and legs up as well so get in there and check it out.

So okay, I kinda told y’all earlier how I had insecurities. Every woman and man has insecurities. If you don’t, you’re a superhuman. End of story. But for me I tend to let the world decide what and how I should look. What I have learned is that no amount of media or what I hear is the ideal look for a woman, is going to sway how I feel when I look in the mirror. Something that has helped me when I’m feeling low and down about my body  is, “you are strong, you are important, and you are beautiful.” It may sound cheesy but sometimes it really helps. Although, more so than not, the gym does the trick for me. It’s a therapy session and a mood booster in so many ways.

Ladies and gents, DO NOT let the world decide how you should act, feel, and be. Don’t let the world decide what the perfect ideal is for what’s okay and not. Who you are and what you look like is not the worlds decision. Feel good in your skin, feel good in who YOU are. Look in the mirror and know you are unique in your own ways and know that that is beautiful.

 

 

 

2019. Bring It On!

We all make goals for the new year. We want to make better decisions and create something that will stick with us through the year. Sometimes they do, sometimes they don’t. Its a hit or miss, and really all depends on the dedication you throw into that goal.

For some of of you and for me its to get into better shape. Now, you might be thinking what the heck A_Jacs, you are in shape!! But there is always more to do. There is always some way to improve.

Mei Fitness makes it easy to stay motivated throughout the year and reach your goals. The price can’t be beat for the service you get! Including tanning! Talk about convenient.

Resolutions can be very frustrating to me if I’m being completely honest. I’ve watched and listened to people all my life saying what they are going to do in the coming year or what they are going to change. The  one thing I have observed is that most of those people do not do as they say or change what was mentioned. That’s the problem for me, with resolutions.

There isn’t much commitment to such sayings. However, telling people who will keep you accountable in such areas that target your specific resolution is very important.

For me I have people everywhere to keep me accountable in my specific resolution of growing in my fitness lifestyle. Making it to the gym when I don’t feel like hitting the weights, as well as actually recording different exercises to reflect on and even post on my social media, which is in fact a big struggle for me.

Even though resolutions are a way to start something new, think of the resolution as a goal to reach. As well as a lifestyle to begin instead of something that comes around every year. This mindset has helped me make strides and improvements towards my goals, ultimately establishing a deep passion for the fitness community.

So bring on the new year with a good support system behind you to help achieve your set goals. Dont be afraid of the challenge that lies ahead, nor failing because in every failure there is success.

Thank y’all for reading, enjoy your New Years!!

My Gym, My fitness, Mei Fitness

Fitness gyms are everywhere. The competition is everywhere. Being able to separate your gym from that competition is a hard thing to do. However, it is very possible as shown by the owner of Mei Fitness.

I first started going to the Southport location, the beginning of this past summer. I had been at LA Fitness for several months and before that I was at the old golds gym off of Washington Street. Both gyms were great although the drive was too long for golds and it was time to move on from LA Fitness. I didn’t know what gym I would move to although I kept hearing about this one gym that was open 24/7 and called Me? I had literally thought thats how it was spelled! (ha)

I wasn’t necessarily comfortable with moving fitness centers. I knew that meant I would have to learn new equipment, the lay of the land and so on. After a week of going back and forth about it and being annoyed of not working out, I bit the bullet. In one of my later posts I talked about how certain things that motivate me just eat at me until it bothers me enough to get to it. Let’s just say I was fed up and needed to get back to building my physique.

I purchased my membership online and decided if I wasn’t going back to LA Fitness I need to (man up) and try out a new spot.

I was blown out of the water when I went into Mei for the first time. The staff were all so kind and I was genuinely amazed at how much they had to offer. I thoroughly enjoyed the fact that the gym wasn’t too busy mid day and even when it was busy it wasn’t craziness everywhere. From that first day I knew I made the right choice of switching up my gym location.

Fitness is a lifestyle and being able to enjoy that lifestyle you have to be in a place you are most comfortable in. Mei Fitness is were I have felt the most comfortable and welcomed.

What Drives My Motivation

Getting into the gym can be taxing on you mentally, physically and very time consuming out of a busy day. Going to the gym isn’t something easy. Its an hour and some of your day spent putting hard work into your body when you might not see the results right away.

Let me fill you in on a few motivational thoughts I fill my head with when its been a long day and I’m not so sure the gym is even worth it.

  • Booty gains

We all know those girls that have the perfect butt without even having to really work for it. Their mama graced them with those curves. And some on us envy those women! Go them!! Seriously. For me, however, I was not given that grace. It’s taken me 4 years to get where I am in that particular part of my body and I am so proud of it! But every time I am just sitting on the couch dreading the gym knowing I need to get there I think, “Well, it won’t get anywhere if I just sit here…” so I get up and start moving towards my goals.

  • Am I having a rough day?

The gym isn’t always a “do I really have to go?” type thought. Sometimes i’m having a rough day, sometimes my days are cloudy. So its not a “do I have to” its more like “I really need to.”, “I really WANT to.” The gym is a therapy. The gym is an escape for me. I get in there and everything else that is noisy in the world drops like a 100 pound weight with my headphones on nothing else matters when I focus on what I want my body to do. Once I’ve left I feel like my day has done a 180 flip. It’s an investment in myself. A very rich investment

  • To look good naked.

Lets be honest… self confidence is very important. Of course everyone is beautiful in their own way but I have found to have very high standards for myself and what I want to personally achieve with my body. Therefore making myself go after a long day or a lazy day I get closer to achieving the goals I want to reach.

  • What is the person next to me doing that I am not.

To be 100% honest here I need to say that sometimes this thought drives me absolutely bonkers! Which is very good in its own way. I will say this is probably the biggest motivation boost I have when it comes to just getting that workout done. I have always had the phrase, “There is always someone bigger, better, and badder than you are.” ingrained into my mind from the time I was walking and riding 1000 pound animals. This phase pushes me in the most miraculous way because the truth of it is real. I will always strive to make the most effort in achieving the goals I have in myself and fighting for my spot on top.

So to come back to my opening thoughts, it is worth it! Completely worth every minute spent in the gym. The results night not come right away but after a while, it becomes a habit, then it becomes a lifestyle, and that is when the results are noticed in yourself and by others.

 

Feel The Burn Shoulder Workout!

Post Shoulder Pump

Hey guys! I know its a Monday, and Monday is my designated leg day so save this one for Tuesday and go check out my last post on Booty Gains! In all seriousness though, this workout destroyed my shoulders! I mean demolished. Keep in mind these workouts are what I personally do, so please be careful! I went on the heavier side with the weight to build muscle, with lower reps.  The necessities for this workout include dumbbells, pre-weighted barbells, and the ground (ha).

  • 50 warmup pushups
  • 4×10-8-6-4 dumbbell shoulder press (increase weight as reps drop)
  • 4×8 dumbbell side raises 
  • 4×8 dumbbell front raise
  • 3×10 Arnold press dropset pre-weighted barbell front raises until failure 
  • 4×12 cable Lat push downs superset 4×15 lat pull downs (not super heavy but challenging enough to burn but not terrible for a small cool down)

I hope y’all enjoy this workout! I definitely did!

 

Booty Gains

Okay ladies, this ones for y’all. Guys, I guess you can try it too but don’t blame me if ya get some weird looks!(ha) In this workout I really pushed hard and heavy. I have some of my top favorite booty gain workouts in here. These are workouts are what I personally do, so please be careful! This workout is on the longer side. I think it took me an hour and a half to complete.

  • 15-20 minute warmup: I like to walk on an incline at 15% at 3mp
  •  Glute activation exercises (with or without resistance bands). 2×20 squats, 2×20 glute bridges, 20 monster walks (I like to do these before my workout so my glutes are forced to wake up and work)
  • Rope cable pull throughs: 4×15-12-12-12
  • Plate good morning alt. Squats, with a 25lb plate: 4×10
  • Sumo squats with dumbbell: 4×7 regular, 7 half from bottom, 7 half from top
  • Heavy Bar Squats: 4×6,6,5,5
  • Lying leg press: 5×10 with different stances (wide, close, normal, feet set at the top, feet set closer to the bottom)
  • Superset 4×8 leg curls with 4×8(each leg) glute press

I hope y’all enjoy this booty burning workout! I was crazy sore the next day! Have fun!

IMG_9495
Post workout pic. Dang near broke my back.

 

 

The Journey to Creating Something Bigger than Just a Name.

I used to believe I only wanted a big butt, a flat stomach, and to be better than those around me. Which is true, for the most part. What I’ve found is that, what I truly want is to be better than my old self, to inspire my followers and the people I speak to on the streets. Most importantly, I want to build other women up to show them that they are absolutely stunning in everything they are. I don’t want to compete with the women around me when I already compete with myself. With that said let me explain the name of this blog page, Wolfness.

I came up with it six months ago, after playing around with the idea of building my own personal brand. I had struggled to think of a name for what I had been dreaming to do and once Wolfness came into my mind nothing else spoke to my soul the way it does. The name itself stands for “she-wolf”. Which really is the biggest component to Wolfness but theres more.

There had been an incident that changed my whole way of thinking as I knew it, and put meaning into my dreams. For years I watched women deliberately shame other women, and I was never strong enough to stand up to these bullies. Yes, “bully” is the term I use, which sounds a lot like the typical school bully. But that’s exactly what I’m talking about people! Bullies exist throughout every stage of life.

This life altering incident started on one of the most used social media platforms, Twitter. There was a mean girl, who made a disturbing comment about what women should and shouldn’t post. Her comment was posted deliberately after my best friend had uploaded a cute bikini pic with her puppers by the pool! Sounds cute, right? That was until she had seen the comment posted making it seem as if her uploaded picture was “to slutty”. 

All of us ladies have a radar. You know the one that sends a chill down your spine indicating that something shady is pointing at you? Well this was that feeling for my friend. She confronted the mean girl, asking if there was a problem. To which her response was snarky and defensive, claiming the tweet hadn’t been about my friend.

The story continues on instagram (we all know what this is)… Long story short, the mean girl got information from a private account and blew it into a petty whirl. It ended with my best friends instagram pages going up on the bullies personal account with mean and nasty words in her caption. All in spite of her own insecurities. Let me tell you, this didn’t sit well with me as a best friend. I mean come on, I was already been fed up with all the hate I’d witnessed between women.

I had commented about the stupidity of the drama she had caused and how judgement only hurts oneself. Whether the tweet had been about my best friend or not, it pointed out her own unfriendliness and insecurities. It wasn’t necessary due the the simple fact that what another woman puts on her social media is none of your business. If you don’t like something, scroll past it and/or unfollow that person. You have that freedom! If you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say it at all. A saying we have learned from the very beginning. With todays society, I have never found something to be more true. Well, maybe a few more things but in this instance I couldn’t have found a more genuine phrase. Life’s to short to be anything but kind.

You see, us women need to stick together. The slut shaming, using derogatory terms such as ugly, fat, unworthy, and disgusting, along with all the other shit (sorry not sorry) we women put on each other, is so damaging to the victims mental well-being. Seeing first hand how the cruelty between women destroys confidence and causes doubt, is where the idea of Wolfness came about. (turning into Dr. Sues y’all)

When I think of a wolf, I think loyal, strong, beautiful, intelligent, caring, personal power, and instinct. This is how us women should be with one another. We should have a pack mentality, like wolves. Be there for each other and protect each other. We should shower love onto one another in a world that is already so cruel. Having the backs of the women around you and putting positivity into their lives with the extraordinary tools we have in todays society, helps unite women as a whole. Look at the other women all around the world and think of them as your pack.

I’ll close this with my favorite quote by Nikita Gill, “If all girls were taught to love each other fiercely instead of how to compete with each other and hate their own bodies, what a different and beautiful world we would live in.” I challenge all of you ladies out there reading this to be a wolf!